I wasn’t going to write a blog today, just things that happen and your mind isn’t in the right place sometimes. I’ve been deep cleaning my house, it keeps my mind off all of the things I don’t want to think about.
Feeling the way I do, about different aspects of life, I know that other single moms would get me, they would get that I feel so much alone in the endless battles we face daily on our own. I know the autism moms would feel me when I say I just don’t know how I am going to get over this super cling on- freak out- meltdown- he’s going to die if he isn’t connected to my hip deal. I know mom’s, in general, could look at me, and know that she needs a break, just a night without someone asking for something, needing me to be the rock, needing me to be the pillar that holds this family tall.
I know how short life is, I know I will miss these times, I know that one day I won’t step on toys, I won’t wonder why the hell the floor is sticky, I won’t need to ask why there are 52 stuffed animals in my bed. I do try my best to cherish these moments, these times because he won’t always be little. However, there is also that echo of depending on yourself and only yourself and wondering how the heck you’re going to make it to tomorrow and do all the stuff you are supposed to do. You wake up to a fresh new day- sleeping child next to you and realize it’s just what you do, you just keep pushing through.
News of an amazing person leaving too soon was heard this week, it breaks my heart for those involved, I have had personal close loss myself, I just don’t know how to be supportive or there for those in need. I’m not sure did I miss that life lesson? did I miss that class?
I do know, that most people take their life for granted, because hey we have time right? sometimes though we don’t, we don’t know when our time is up, we don’t know what will happen. Live the best life you can, dispose of the toxic in your life, anything or anyone who causes you actual pain.
Change the things in your life that you want to change, make that list of goals you want to reach and chase after them, make them your reality because we don’t know what is going to happen, I do know that other than paying for my departure ahead of time is in my future, that I’d like people to remember me for being honest, funny, kind to those that count, and a person who never gave up.
Inspire another, a smile, a few words, they can go miles for those who need them, we never know who really needs them.
Inspire the change, you wish to see in this world, in this life that you have.
Be a part of the inspiration
Self- love~ Health ~ Change